i just realised something when i was checking my clinical placements for this semester. (ended up at Western Hospital in Footscray.. yummylicious viet rice noodles, here i come!)

i realised that i have a thing for trains and trams in Melbourne...

weird kinda affinity for something that moves....

i like to look out the windows and watch the world literally pass by in a whirl of colours.

wondering where those people in that cute little brownstone are heading, whether they are a family and whether they are happy...

or maybe even that cute little boy that i saw that one time waving to me with his fat little fists on his father's shoulders as the train passed by. i wonder if he like trains like me, if he is going to be a doctor like me, if he loves the whirl of colours at the window like me....

i just love the whoooosh of train...

super uber fun....

Random recipe

Creamy Crockpot Chicken:

2 breast fillets
1 can of Cream of Chicken
1/4 cup of cooking wine
mushrooms

Put that all into a crockpot on HIGH until chicken gets tender. Scoop out the gravy and put it in a pot to simmer. Also add:

8oz of sour cream

Then heat the gravy and serve while hot with the chicken.

Voila!

Easy peasy dish for students. Serves 4 too i might add so ration according to appetite and number of dinner partners.

and most of all, it's fuss-free! no hassle chopping up, cooking, frying... just plain healthy stewing.

and did you notice that there's no oil involved??!! did you?? did you?? healthy, oil-free food for the brain... lots of proteins.

for the vegemaniac, just put in celery and carrots to stew with the chicken and add brocolli in the pot with the gravy.

omg, i sound like freaking Jamie Oliver or Nigella Lawson...


p.s. i did try this recipe so it totally rocks! and so little dirty dishes to clean afterwards....the mark of a good student-ey dish for the uninitiated.

due to the effects of Week 1 lectures and PBL...

Listening to: Heaven by DJ Sammy

Finishing up: my PBL for tomorrow

Ingesting: nothing (after having lectures on obesity and nutrition, it's no wonder i'm half scared to death about the things i put into my mouth, all the while thinking "is this low in GI?", "is this going to increase my BMI?" .. it's so frustrating that it's not funny)

Thinking: about morbidly obese males who might have pseudo-micropenis (due to the fat pad on their scrotums) and pseudo-gynaecomastia (abnormal glandular breast development) and morbidly obese females who might have polycystic ovarian syndrome.

omg.... i sound intelligent for once...

i'm so having nightmares about saturated fats chasing me with fat-clobbered fists and fat-dripping teeth....

anyone up for ROund 2??

it's the start of a new semester in the life of Mel the workin'-it meddie...

it's just Monday but it's worth 1 PBl tutorial and 2 lectures...

talk about workin' it...

and the whole uni is quiet except for the frantic shuffling or some may say the purposeful striding of meddies of all years.

we are the only insane ones back for round 2... can practically hear the "ding ding ding" bell of ROUND 2....

even dents are still on their sweet sweet holidays but we are back and the timetable is hitting us with a vengeance complete with the Club of Harsh Reality.

but look at it this way, people, i'm 1/12 my way through med school...

not so bad for a girl who once dreamt of becoming part of Doctors Without Borders...

i remain optimistic.


and so my fairytale starts again... *smiles*

I'M A BIG GIRL!!

*ROAR*

I CAN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF!!


lol, yea right... who am i kidding??!!

insomnia setting in...
must be the episode of Incredible Tales that i watched on Channel 5....
and for goodness sake, it was not THAT scary...
i think....

another few more days before Melbourne, here i come...
2nd Semester bearing down on me...
and already the timetable is looking oh-so-scary....
what the heck...
another 5.5 years to go....

feeling quite out of sorts now...
must be again, the insomnia setting in...
shall count sheep now..
or i could just count the hours i'm going to waste on getting the anatomy of the chest right....
or i could HAVE brought back my teddy dog, Jay from Melbourne where he's been very lonely and cold...
or i could warm up hot milk...
or i could read the book on my bedside table...

or i could just list the ways i could put myself to sleep...

you're leaving on jetplane as i'm typing this... never was one for geography but i think you'll be over the ocean now...

just say that you'll take care of yourself...

XOXO Mel

shoes phase

a girl can never have too many shoes.

neither can a girl can have too many phases.

at least both the above statements apply to me.

coz the whole have-as-many-shoes-as-you-can phase has hit me and hit me real darn hard.

so just in under half hour in singapore, i bought 3 pairs of shoes.
one from Ipanema.
two from Far East Plaza.

one pair of simple sandals. very Amazonian goddess
oen pair of black high heel wedges that are gorgeous
one pair of white low heel pumps

but i still want more.
on my wish list: black Converse sneaks, red high heeled pumps, the most perfect flats ever made and whatever that catches my fancy...

the pearl of the orient

so for some mother-daughter bonding time, me and mum went to Hong Kong, the pearl of the orient (was it really called that? i remembered learning this in primary school...) for some h serious girl downtime namely shopping and eating, two of the things that are certified aphrodisiacs. but i digress...

and the VERY first thing that i noticed when i touched down was HK people do everything in excess, most expecially length or height wise. check out the above picture and just look at how many towering buildings HK city has!! each building including flats are at least a devastating scary 30 storeys high!! i counted!! and the buses there are also stretched out in height wise, all of them are double deckers!! how cool is that?? it's like their country motto "Height is gooood!!"

and the city area was crazy chocked full of people and cars, like good ole Malaysia or Singapore. but somehow, it felt steamier in HK. i was perpetually swathed in a sheen of sweat and goodness knows how many baths i had in just one day. and the shopping was not so bad but the freaking travel bouchure forget to mention that by "a shopping paradise", it meant that HK is good for travellers with a good sizeable amount of dough!! sure, the streets were full of every brand name imaginable. Paris Hilton would be in heaven there. Gucci, Prada, Guess, Ferragamo and French brands i can barely pronounce, let alone spell. heck, i am a girl that appreciates brands and the money and human effort gone into producing a handmade calfskin Chloe bag with 24k gold plates but i think i would be able to appreciate it more and stop gawking at the windows and actually go in and buy something from the smugly-attired sales person in there with perfect straight white teeth.

but that isn't to say that i didn't have fun on the trip. hey, i don't go for shopping when i travel man! i did go all the way to Victoria's Peak and went for the HK's Madame Tussaud's Wax Musuem. and boy, was that fun! and here are the pics to show that.

oooh, everyone's favourite villain that.. Hitler...

Rembrandt and me. was quite surprised to see this great European artist in the HK wax Musuem
Pablo Picasso, the very master himself in the...err, wax.... he looked incredibly lifelike Albert Einstein and his famous groundbreaking formulae...ooh just love his white shock-like hair
the iconic Miss Marilyn Monroe and the legendary airvent scene. and on my side, the wind was blowing up too and my skirt almost flew up. thank goodness though....
was hoping that i could be the girl silhoette in the background but it was not meant to be, Mr Bond...

my fave action hero of all time, Indiana Jones. i'm in love with Temple of Doom!! but in this, he just looks disporpotionate!!oooh, i just absolutely love his brooding looks... yums...
Wacko Jacko pre-baby-dangling-and-child-molestation... why oh why did you do the skin grafting, Mr Jackson??!!and this was on the Avenue of Stars, HK version of Hollywood Walk of Fame. i don't watch many HK movies, so Stephan Chow's star was the only one i took picture with...

and now the complaints and gripes that i had on this trip. no trip is ever perfect with a few whines and complaints here and there. and the major gripe i have is that the HK people haven't been exactly educated on manners. but i do like to stress that these are the people that i met in the city and not the HK friends that i have in trinity or in Melb Uni. heck, my HK friends are sooo much nicer that when i went to HK, i was utterly shocked at the sometimes-uncivilised behaviors of the people there. the taxi drivers that i met were uber rude in their words to their countrymen and even to us tourists and they were also money-hungry. maybe it was the fact that we are tourists, but we are Chinese tourists hailing from the lands of Malaysia and not white and posh Brit-speaking. but oh well, even though so, it sort of made the trip less enjoyable especially for me, a non-Canto speaking Chinese. i would just be standing there smiling dumbly while the hawker might be cursing my family in Canto to my ignorance.

so i have decided to MASTER Canto and learn to curse in Canto in 7 different ways before i go back to Hong Kong, the pearl of the Orient.

schsh-kool....

it's been almost ages since i stepped foot in the M'sian education system. and today, me and Aichen minus Ju Li who was still fast asleep decided to go back to both Foon Yew 2 and SSI to see the guys and the teachers.

and Oh. My. Gosh.

it was just crazy being back there.

SSI's changed so darn much that i feel like i'm stepping into an alternate universe.

fell like such a visitor.

and boy, did i feel so outsider-ish with my red Wonder Woman shirt and my jeans from all the brown-uniformed-clad students.

but heck, i was so happy to see all of my former classmates that it was not funny at all.

they changed

i changed

everyone changed

everything changed

even the freaking audio visual room changed too

it was like an epitome that nothing stays the same, for better or worse...

of rom-coms and ill-conceived notions...

true to my female-ness, i have spent my 19 years watching romantic comedies starring the irisdiscent smile of Meg Ryan and whoever that played the guy who caught her eye... and boy, can i name my favourite rom-coms in under 10 seconds!

You've Got Mail...
(this has remain my absolute favourite. maybe it's the fact that Meg played a shopkeeper in The Bookshop Around The Corner, an absolutely delish piece of heaven on earth filled with the Storybook Lady and lots of quaint children's books)

Sleepless In Seattle...
(This has got to be the epitome of Love At First Sight and Serendipity)

The Lakehouse...
(Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves were absolutely heartbreaking in this show)

Sabrina...
(not the Teenage Witch version, thank you very much. Sabrina and Harvey's on-again, off-again affair do not interest even one romantic gene in my whole entire body... but i'm talking about the Harrison Ford version, the old classic of your-mum-and-dad's-film-collection... watch it for the sheer old-time romantic in you....)

Turn Left, Turn Right...
(who can ever resist Takashi Kaneshiro and those yummylicious locks of his?! and not to mention, the sheer coincidence and fate of that particular love affair.. but i do admit that several times in that movie, i wanted to twist the male and female lead's heads ala the girl in The Exorcist 360 degrees around and ask them to take a freaking good look around!! lol)


yea, they amy be the most stereotyped movies of the whole Hollywood history, but heck, i think that in our world of freaking mindless cruelty and hopelessness, we all need a little pick-me-up in the size of just under 2 hours. and i happen to like my romantic comedies, thank you very much. yes, i do like movies like V for Vendetta but sometimes, all i need is a couple of laughs, a few lines of romantic sappiness to make my world feel just a bit better, or as some romantic cynics would probably sneer, to delude myself with ridiculous notions of love.

i shall be the judge of that....


*i do miss my fairytale...*

and so the holidays go on...

and the fairytale goes on too...

and the grind of life goes on too...

endlessly.....

"once upon a time, in a land far, far away, there lived a princess...."

there was the noise of kids squirming in their seats and parents shush-ing them...

and there was the sweet buttery smell of popcorn...

and there was the mouth-watering smell of hotdog wafting from the seat next to you....


and there was the presence of you next to me...

and there was the green ogre-ey face and his beloved green lover looming above us, in taht sognature cartoon-ish face....

and then there was that moment...


XOXO Mel

A-RELAXING

so yes, people.. am back in JB, in the hot sticky humid weather that makes my hair go limp and my face start to crawl with perspiration..

but heck care...

i just a truly msian breakky this morning which consisted of thosai and puri and various spicy yummy curries... and that made me thought of the cereal with cold milk and the ham-and-cheese sandwiches i always had for breakky in Melb or rather the non-existent breakky that i sometimes have in protest of the 8am lectures i have 2 times a week...

and on the plane flight home, i told myself that this 1month of break has got to be the MOST relaxing break ever because come 16th of July, it's gonna be another one of those race-to-the-finish-line-sprint-without-water-or-fruit kinda thing... no stopping to smell the flowers nor would there be any stoning sessions... it would be work all the way... except this time, it would be harder (we're doing nutrition and metabolism the next sem!!) and longer (a full 14 weeks, 2 weeeks longer than last sem!!)..

so yes, a-relaxing i must go....

PBS

Reading: Ethical Models of Doc-Patient Relationship



Eating: Nothing except my lovely lovely lovely green tea!! PJ loves it too!! and I like being Santa Claus, Kelvin!! and PJ appreaciates it!!



Listening: Shakira's Hips Don't Lie and PJ&Kelvin's shouts of "What the heck?..."



Channeling Rachel now..."PBS SUCKS!!" yep, sure, PBS is over yesterday... but heck, it was the worst paper i have ever sat for in my entire exam-oriented life, a whole 19 years of it!! like Rach said, at times, it was like a instintive paper, you basically take a look at the paper and then just choose the 1st answer that SOUNDS right to you, instead of relying on your logic/rationale/whatever you have crammed into your brain the alst 12 weeks.



by the time i was done, for a moment, i suddenly felt that my brain was void of everything. ........................................................................................

........................................................................................

........................................................................................



it really IS the case... the first ever time i experienced such a thing before in my life, the entire 19 years of it too!! like i just poured my heart, soul, spirit, brain, mind, knowledge along with my nerves, hypothalamus, lymph, blood, sweat, tears and all the bodily fluids and organs into the freaking 2-hour paper that is only worth a mere 22.5% and requires us to be the most efficient machines ever... we have to inhale 84 one-hour lectures, diagrams and all for this 2-hour exam which has 60 complex MCQs and 7 short answer questions, much less writing an essay... so yes, time management in that tiny window of time is absolutely crucial to the every milisecond.

of sexual crimes in America and champions...

i was having my study break cum lunch when i swiched on the TV in protest of my long hours of mugging and i happen to chance upon The Oprah Show which was one of my favourites and still is.... and Oprah was talking about child sexual crimes in America and how America seemed to be confused about sexual offenders.

and i was struck by what one of the guest said on Oprah. Bill O'Reilly claimed that once a sexual crime was committed towards a child, the criminal should be just put away for life, without parole...

somehow, i have mixed feelings about this claim. yes, the guy who did it should be given a suitable punishment, not given rehabilitation and a small fine (that was what one Vermont judge passed to a sexual crime offender who raped a 6 year old girl over the course of 4 years). and yes, it was a heinous crime. the victim was a child for goodness sake!

but on the other hand, does the guy deserve to be put away for life even when he is deemed be to remorseful and wants to start life anew??

but then again, how the heck would we know that he is really really really regretful for what he did?? how would we know that he would not prey on another kid again?

does that justify O'Reilly's claims that all sexual offenders deserve a life sentence?


and then O'Reiily also said that all fathers should look at their kids in the eyes and reassure then that no matter what happens, they will always save them, rescue them from any situation. and because of that, until the fathers arrive, they are to fight with whatever strength and courage they have and be careful of all strangers. That i fully agree with him. i read countless autobiographies about kids who have been abducted and kidnapped and sexually preyed on and how their captors kept them submissive by using psychological tactics like telling them repeatedly that their parents do not want them anymore and are not looking for them and they(the captors) are the only ones that care for them.

therefore, i think it is extremely crucial for parents to always reaffirm and reassure their kids that come what may, they will always be there for the kids and the kids should never give up hope and have courage to face anything..

for me, i always know that my parents, my dad and mum will be there anytime, anywhere everyday of my life. even though i am overseas and pretty much oceans away from them, that thought enough gives me courage to keep going. i guess, i have been conditioned and reminded since young that they love me and will always do. and i have always felt loved and wanted throughout my life.

so yes, as O'Reilly said across the TV set into my apartment, fathers should always be the "champions of their kids"....

in my case, my dad and mum are both my "champions"....

Ahhh....

Listening to: Wayne Wonder's Hold Me Now (reminds me of Hawaiian beaches and glorious sunsets)

Eating: Cadbury's Brunch Bar (awesome stuff, PJ!! u got me addicted!!)

Doing: PBS Past Year Exams

Wearing: my old, comfy jammies

Thinking: all about the characteristics of the Haversian System

Wishing: I was hundred miles away on a beach, with a juice in my hand and a string of pooka shells on my neck


4 more days to E-Day man!! then just one week of that and I will be H-O-M-E!! i can't wait to see my family and my friends again, even though this routine has been going on since last year. i still feel the squirmy, suppressed jolt of excitement whenever i look at my empty suitcase in the corner of my room....

it will be a total goddess reward to finally come home and unwind from all the medical stuff i had to cram into my head.... i just want a nice, relaxing, doing-nothing holiday...much like a hot, warm, foamy, sweet-smelling bubble bath with candles and a bowl of choc-covered strawberries and an awesome book and nice music.... and after the soak, i will feel so good and refreshed that i can literally FLOAT out of the bathtub and walk on air with a shiny, scrubbed-clean aura around me!!


so until that day, i shall go a-nerding and read all about the Haversian Systems and eat brunch bars to keep my energy up instead of strawberries....

18th birthdays and BBQ feasts

happy 18th birthday, dear Rachel!!

may all your wishes come true!!

many happy returns of the day!!

hope you enjoyed the BBQ feast ya?? and all your lovely lovely pressies!! and your boy boy is ultimately the sweetest, girl!! give him a big kiss and hug when you get back to spore....

so you ARE 18 already....legal for well...practically EVERYTHING!! so yea, just take your time to do everything okie?? after all, you did do the 1st one on the list which was alcohol... but don't worry, it's just a teensy weensy little bit in that HUGE cup of lemonade...and you didn;t get drunk which is good... a small step goes a looong way, girl!! lol

anyways, have fun and enjoy the rest of the day...

XOXO Mel who is already 19 and wishes that she is 18....

the defintion of a nerd

Andrew's recent blog post was all about the definition of being nerdy and how his la-la land was study-land and it just got me thinking...

about MY definition of being "nerdy"....

so yes, i admit i AM guilty about the fact that i DO label some of my classmates/coursemates/random people on the street as being nerds. and yes, i DO sometimes (yes, most of the times actually) based my observations on their appearance and the presene of books on their arms and the unmistakable heavy bagpack over the shoulder and the thick glasses.

and these are all made on the fact that i might not know them well enough to make that observation..

so am i superficial?? shallow??jugdemental??

i guess the answer is YES....

yes, sometimes (yes, most of the times) appearances DOES matter whether we like it or not

whether we have countless of times declare that we WILL not fall into that superficial pit

yes, sometimes we are all human and we DO pass judgements on people, random people...

yes, everything we do, say, think, wear, carry, act etc makes an IMPRESSION on otehr people, whether we like it or not... whether we moan and groan and say that first impressions doesn't count....

and so, tomorrow, maybe, just maybe i might dig into my closet and throw out any turtlenecks, white boring shirts, plaid skirts, old fashioned jeans.... just in case....

the view

i have the choice of blogging of either of these:
a) how tired i am after a full day prac session
b) how much work to be done for the coming exams (84 one-hour lectures to go through)
c) how many things i have to juggle on top of the workload
or
d) how i feel that all the hard work will be worth it in the end

and i choose D....

after all, i am all about the long-haul and it's definitely no easy road to my destination and the bottom line is that in this line that i am in now, there is NO destination. there is only constant improvment, renewal... a never-ending road to some unknown, unreacheable evening sunset horizon.... at least, the view is beautiful from where i am.

i am after all, facing the sunset in in its full glory.

and the journey is wonderful.

embryology and life....

quiz coming up again. and this time, we have biochem, embryology, pharmacology and microbiology to read up on.... interesting but tough...

so can't blog much since all i can think about is how cells in an embryo proliferate and become a full-fledged baby... and let me tell you this, appreciate your mother as much as you can man...the things she goes through to give birth to you is astounding. and how life happens inside your mother and how it grows from just a tiny cell and just knowing what to do to sustain itself is amazing. you just wonder how it can think and plan for the future with what little resources it has. to prepare itself with nutrients, it develops a yolk sac and then when the time comes to abandon the yolk sac, it already has a placenta in place to provide food... and so many more examples...

all i can say is that life is one big miracle...

genetics

this week was all about genetics and to conclude it, the lecturer invited a lady who was diagnosed with beta-thalassemia to come talk to us about her condition. it was a somber talk that a few meddies cried. i guess, being meds, we have always talk, breathe, eat even dream about diseases. we know the symptoms, we know the treatments or in certain sad cases, lack of treatments, we know about the side effects, we know about the deteriorating conditions.

but we seldom attach the whole humanity side to these illnesses.

we forget the suffering part, the hopelessness of it all, the emotions behind the disease, the human behind the diagnosis.

we forget that they have families who love them and would do anything for them.

we forget that they have friends that would miss their company and have an impact on their lives.

we forget that they are a part of communities that would suffer from the loss of them.'

we forget that they have emotions and thoughts and intelligence and personalities.

we forget that they too have souls.

and they are not mere perfect textbook examples of patients with health conditions.




*once upon a time, there lived a princess who love hugs...*

Cold-Inducing Coughs and experiments....

update: i am still croaking and this cough is so weird man... according to Kelvin and his crazy theories (this time minus the help of PJ), it is due to the cold weather and it wil last for at least one month and once i am cleared from this cough, i will get immunity and i will never get it again...

what i want to say is HELLO??!! that does not make sense at all man!!! does this mean that after this bout of coughing, i will NO LONGER cough in my whole entire life??!! that is just soooo crappy man... and he's supposed to be a medical student who is going to be a full-fledged doctor and is going to treat some poor patients in the near future... i shudder at that thought...LOL.... but we'll see whether his theory pans out then....

introducing Mel Test Subject No.1 in Kelvin's Experiment for Cold-Inducing Coughs....

*cough cough*

but it does make sense actually.. the whole business of the cough being cold-weather-induced as i only cough the hardest and most often during nightime and that's when the weather is super chilly...

oh well.. we shall see then, would-be-Dr-Kee....

week 8

i'm croaking due to my cough that lasted for one week and just recently got worse because of a stupid sore throat....

and i so want my pizza.... grrr.... *roar*

update: i have just gotten my vacuum cleaner and my slow cooker!! yay!! this is awesome man... now i get to vaccum my room anytime i want to and i can finaly cook my fave soups and broths!! it's the guranteed comfort food for the coming winter and the now-here autumn which is really freezing me into a Popsicle... besides, broths and soups are the easiest and cheapest to do... especially if you are surviving on a student's budget of time and money... just throw in carrots, celeries, meat, dried oysters and potatoes in the morn and voila! you get a nice comforting hot warm-feeling-in-tummy soup for lunch and sometimes, dinner! easy peasy... so thanks to kelvin who helped me carry back both of my brand new additions to my apartment... and my hands are not achng from your package of minced pork or chrysanthemum tea..LOL

announcement: i am friends with an international standard violinist by the way! rach, you go, girl! knock them dead in japan ya?? and make us all meddies proud of you!! you have finally broken the mold of meddies being boring nerds who have no talents except for mugging...LOL... and the musical last night rock... and for heaven's sake, please please please, i'm begging you to at least play ONE song for us!! pretty please with sugar and a cherry on top??

and so week 8 passed happening-ly (is there such a word?) with lectures on embryology, PBL tutorials on an old lady bowler who possibly suffered from heat stroke from being too active on the bowling field, another anatomy prac where we got to incise and sew cadevers up, an all-out shopping trip and a sore throat... *cough cough*

Happily N'ever After

Listening to: Sukiyaki by 4PM

Weather: freaking cold that you want to curl up in your comforter and your fave pyjamas...

Doing: My Anatomy Dissection notes for tomorrow!!



have always wanted to see Happily N'ever After...

"...will I ever have my own fairytale??..." (Lissyl 2006)

I think I already have....

*dreams*

dissection and life...

Listening to: Keith Urban's Tonight I Wanna Cry (the perfect song for the gloomy Melbournian weather)

Reading: my PBS notes on visceral systems

Eating: nothing

Drinking: My favourite green tea (i can drink this forever)

wow, the 1st week back after Easter has been crazy!! so much to do, so many people to see, so many places to go, so little time!!

1st off, i had my 1st dissection class and boy, was it interesting! we got this cool surgical intern guy at RMH as our tutor and thank goodness! he was really good man. and he answered all our stupid, anooying questions with teh patience of a grandmother. and he is BUFF!! HUGE BICEPS AND TRICEPS!! and totally built!! geez, where does he get the time off to body build man??!! aren't surgical interns supposed to be the busiest of the lot??!! oh well, into the bodies then... so yes, i had my 1st exposure to a dead body!! yayness! and we got this old fat dude who died of complications of diabetes and i do mean COMPLICATIONS!! he had like gangrene (toes of both feet amputated), heart diseases (metal plates in his aorta) and liver problems (he had numerous operations at the abdomen area)... and his tummy was HUGE, probably due to alcohol and unhealthy diet... suddenly, looking at him and all his problems makes me determined that i will never ever let any of my close friends or family members ever end up like him, unhealthy and probably unhappy from all the health problems he has... so people, take care of yourself... coz the cadaver that I saw did not look pretty at all and he did suffer ALOT... really hits home that health is really more important than anything else...

but let's rewind abit... so when i first walked into the dissection lab, all i could see was rows and rows of cadavers covered by white clothes and the smell was unmistakably of embalming fluids and it was cold in there. so yes, i admit that i was kinda scared at that particular moment. but in like 5 minutes, as i stood there like phey yee and jacq and lun, it went away. it sort of felt that i was meant to be there and nothing can change that and the sooner that i got over the stupid irrational emotion, the better off i'll be.... but that's not to say that i did not feel the pang of pity and empathy i felt for the poor guy the moment they lifted the cover sheet. the feeling when i first looked into his face was undescribable. i will never ever forget the fleeting emotion. it's hard to describe.

a mixture of sadness, pity squeezing at my heart.... i think.... and probably a bit of disgust and fear... coz like i said before, death is never a pretty sight...

but the show had to go on... so we had a look at various X rays and then a severed lower limb with the thorax region....

after the dissection class, i was walking back with phey yee and we were talking about how we felt so much like medical students now once we had our 1st taste of cadavers and death and how human we were still going to be even after countless encounters with death and patients. coz after all, the human tough is what all doctors need, in my opinion, to be a healer and carer of the sick. knowledge and information is good, but definitely not enough to make your patient feel like they can put their lives in your hands. coz that's what you have in your hands. the lives of a thousand people....

and then, there's an exam next monday to test my knowledge so far and i'm still not feeling particularly confident about it so now back to mugging and studying about visceral systems...

Easter is over...

Easter is almost over and there goes my break from medic.... now am back to the grindstone... a few things to look forward to in the 2nd part of Sem 1....

1. my 1st ever dissection class!! yay-ness!! i'm almost faint from excitement but i sure do hope i won't faint from the stench.... i heard that after coming out of the room, you feel as though you can eat a thousand horses!! u are THAT hungry.... and kelvin's sister said that once you start dissection, you'll never think of lap-cheong (chinese wax sausages) in an edible light ever again...LOL teh bodies apparently stink of that smell... and i do LOVE my lap-cheong....

2. not being quite the baby of medical school anymore.... after all, i've been there for 6 weeks....

3. being 19!! when i start sch, i'll be 19!! which isn't much to me... not as much as 18 though...

4. just being in lectures and PBL tutorials.... talking about injured spinal cords and penises taht erect for four hours straight due to spinal cord injury (it's called priapism!! what a cool word man...) the things you learn in group study is oh-so-useful man... *grinz

5. having lunch near the toilets (rachel, we need a change of environment man...) in Union House (Rachel, we need a change of lunching places man....)

6. hanging out in the library for our next class to start... doing absolutely nothing.....

7. waking up to 8am lectures and stumbling to thetres with half-awake eyes and barely-there consciousness....

All for Nic...

a huge shout out to Nicholas Chai....

HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY!!!

MANY HAPPY RETURNS OF THE DAY!!!

and most importantly,

MAY ALL YOUR WISHES & DREAMS & ASPIRATIONS COME TRUE!!


just so you know, Nic, i'm sorry for not making time to meet you when i was back home... there was no excuse for it... all i can say is that i'm really sorry and that i hope to see you soon in the june holidays....

but for today, enjoy yourself and make the most out of it... you only turn 19 once.... and heck, you have to do it properly....

you deserve all the happiness in the world and you'll work hard for it and you'll have it.... all the best to you... and i miss you very much....

Muaackz... XOXO Mel

P.S. i wanted to post a very flattering picture of Nic but my USB drive is with Ai Lynn.....

there's more to medicine that meets the eye... eg the issue of paternalism. when you are a doctor, you are not only a healer, but you are also an ethicist, philosopher, moralist, confidante, healer, scientist, risk-taker...

Easter revelation

it's Easter break now and Melbournites sure are making a HUGE deal out of it, what with the pounds-heavy choc eggs and choc bunnies... and Koko Black's window display look absolutely delicious, literally and metaphorically....

and Easter break means that i have succeeded in going through the first half of Semester 1 and it's one long awaited break... i could go on and on moaning about the ever increasing workload and information that my poor brain needs to process but I WILL NOT... after all, i did choose this course out of interest and heck, it IS interesting...

"Keep interested in your career, however humble; it is a changing fortune in the changing fortunes of time...." - Desiderata...
(for those who have not read Desiderata, it is the most incredible guide to life ever.... so get your copy now... my dad was the one who read it to me when i was young and i will be forever grateful to him for it.)

so yes, Easter break is only ONE WEEK so Mel's Must Do List for Easter stands thus:

1. Finish the Health Practice essay by Tues

2. Revise the whole of Anatomy and Histology lectures, despite the fact that Dr Eizenberg is a lousy lecturer except for the times he took off his layers of shirts to entertain us

3. Do my videotape interview and review it!! and get over the fact that i might look 10 pounds heavier on camera.

4. do more exercise

5. cook more exotic and complicated dishes

6. time for some SELF LOVE and SELF CARE!! eg yoga, catching up with friends....

7. prepare myself mentally for the dissection sessions we are having after Easter and pray that i dissolve into jelly the moment they lift the sheet covering the cadaver

8. SELF LOVE AND SELF CARE!! i write this twice as Term 1 was absolutely killing for anyone mentally and emotionally and physically.... i need back my streak of life.... it was slowly but surely ebbing away...

9. REFLECTION: on the days that have passed and the days that are and the days that have yet to come.... and just sit and think of anything that comes to mind...


- no more stories for Mel , just work and work -